Five Years WOW!

WRITTEN 12/22/2022

5 years WOW! I cannot believe that it has been that long already. The memories of December 22, 2017, always remain so clear. There were so many emotions that day and every time the 22nd rolls around I can feel the anxiety build up. I did not plan for any of this, and it definitely makes me question why me? This past year was rough and still tends to pull the floor out from under me. As I sit here and write this post, I am trying so hard to bring the positive out of this entire journey. I am nowhere close to the years that many of the individuals I have been blessed to meet through this adventure, but their motivation and support are helpful. I have my days, but I honestly am thankful to be able to wake up each day and make the decision to have a good day. 

I am not a poet but here is my version of explaining my MS and what it has challenged me with. 

Here

Stage presence has taught you how to hide your pain.

But behind those close doors your performance begins to crumble. 

The stage makeup allows you to step into a world of magic and imagination where you can be anything or anyone. Life just seems to be untouchable. 

But it's very clear once the makeup is gently taken off that you are human. 

Standing in the wings listening to music and feeling your body want to move.

But the best thing you can do is mark the steps with your hands and mentally visualizing your body completing the steps.

Watching hard work and dreams sit under the stage lights is heartbreaking.

But the show must go on. 

Trying to understand why your foot won't come off the floor or why the signals in the body don't seem to work is frightening.

But the tears of determination gather the energy to help you map through the movement step by step.

Continuing to move in a circular motion seems to be the direction of the dance.

But you know that one day you will learn to move in every direction available on stage, so things don't seem so predictable.

Walking around in pain seem to be a part of the game while you work to educate and help others learn.

But you manage to continue through with grace and a smile.

There are times where negativity sneak through the emotional walls that have been put up. 

But the positivity and smile upon the stage lights always conquers. 

You will one day wear the dance shoes that brought love and spirit to the stage. 

For now, you put on your walking shoes and show everyone that one of these days your feet and heart will find its way back to the stage. It's not the path you envisioned but you hope to follow the yellow brick road and find the wizard who will guide you to your place that brings you the most joy. 

2023 I am ready to do si do with you. Let's make it great and promenade back to the stage. 

I chose to NOT GIVE UP!

I AM ME!

I will continue to GROW!

I am STRONG!

I can LIVE my DREAMS!

#RENITASTRONG

I am the INEVITABLE MS DEFYER

WATCH ME!!!